i work in research. i previously published in machine learning, and hold various patents for my work in hallucination prevention and computer vision models. i continue to publish papers, and am interested in working on post-training inference, new token processing architectures, model pruning, and getting llms to write/deliver comedy.

i grew up in a small farm town in upstate new york. this has influenced my deep perversion for agtech.

i previously held a new york state powerlifting record for all 3 lifts.

things i did before dropping out of university

• promoted for Mr.Purple

• led a research lab working on surgical robotics

• founded an edtech startup, made an unreasonable amount of money

• founded another edtech startup, did not make as much money

• founded another edtech startup, made no money

• founded a drone startup, made enough money to bankroll my dates

• worked on a bunch of consumer hardware

• founded the only truly generalist pre-seed fund in nyc

• ran a bunch of growth at a seed-stage caffeine cpg

• diamond in tft

• have eaten over 1000 cuban sandwiches

7/20/2025